Why I don’t need music to express myself anymore

I´ve been stuttering since I was five. I´ve been making music since I was six.

I´ve been stuttering severely until twenty-four. I´ve been pursuing a career in music until twenty-five.

Is it coincidence, or is there a connection?

People ask me all the time why I quit music. I really believe that stuttering holds the answer.

It’s all about the need to fully express yourself.

As a shy, introvert and stuttering kid I found a way to express my feelings through music. It started with playing the guitar. Later on singing and writing lyrics got involved.

I now had this amazing opportunity to let people hear who I was. Fluently!

Somewhere around fifteen years old I had my first gig where I actually sang. I invited my parents so I could convince them to get me singing lessons. I NEEDED to sing and I NEEDED it to be as good as possible so people would love listening to me.

As the years passed I kept on singing. I also kept on stuttering.

I moved out of my parent’s place and then there came that day

Where I suddenly had this overwhelming urge to do something about the stuttering. As I dived in that process from that day on, the focus on music got less and less each month.

I found all these inspiring people on the Internet. Talking about reaching your full potential, expressing yourself, doing the things you fear most, living a fulfilled life. Because of those people I started looking for ways to become more fluent, and I did.

The more fluent I got, though, the less interest there was for music.

whyidontneedmusic1 Stuart joining us at a gig!

I went out to clubs and bars, talking to everybody. Approaching strangers on the streets during the day. I looked for breathing and grounding exercises. I read books on communication and body language.

I found the thing I always longed for as a kid,

but what I was hiding from behind the guitar and microphone.

FULLY EXPRESSING MYSELF

Talking, instead of singing.

Somewhere down the line singing felt like pseudo-expressing. I couldn’t connect with the words I sang anymore. I couldn’t connect to the people showing up at our concerts anymore. Asking myself why people are singing to these lyrics, why they’re smiling, why they’re dancing.. It didn’t make any sense!

Then we quit the band

And a couple of months later Stuart and me started Broca Brothers.

And now you’re here, reading my ‘lyrics’ through which I express myself. I find these lyrics to be a lot closer to the truth than what I used to sing.

I can’t emphasize the importance of learning to FULLY express yourself more than with this example. It’s something that’s within each and everyone of us. Something that wants to come out, that needs to come out in order to live a fulfilled life.

I know you have it too. When those thoughts arise of “I should speak up more”, “I wish I would’ve said … to my friends”. As persons who stutter, we all go through it. Scratch that! 80% of the people on this planet (if not more) go through this.

I hope you can feel the honesty and truth in the things we do. We really believe in what we’re talking about at Broca Brothers. That overcoming stuttering is something that can be done, no doubt about that. We call the proces ‘learning to fully express yourself’. It’s the proces where you find courage. Courage to be honest, to search for what’s right for you, to find the real you behind the stuttering and with that comes fluency.

You might not immediately get what I’m saying here. But you will in some time. Stuart and I will be talking a lot about it.

Talk soon.

P.S if you like reading this, join our email list. We’re working on an awesome free E-book wherein we talk about all our breakthroughs we had when working on stuttering and our speech. Obviously only available to those who join the Broca Brothers community! Feel free to join here!

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